i can finally breathe

AWESOME! finished the summer...(camp) anyways..and now i am at the B.I again. waiting to graduate..TOMORROW!! I cannot believe that it is seriously almost over...and i will start over again in...3 weeks ;) LOL ...I am going to Sheilas house tomorrow..and i am so excited..that i am going..:) YAY YAY YAY YAY YAY
...God is so good...and i cannot wait to write about it..when I HAVE TIME...(which isn't now) so i will write later most def..
<3 u people

my mind is wandering

ok..wow..back at camp and i was so THROWN back into things..deeper then they were when I left. but OH how thankful I have become to know that Our God is a God who works..*laughs* I AM SO THANKFUL to know that he is always working regardless of how we feel about things. We have a camper who is a very big cutter, and she is addicted to many things and..oh i was so angry with God t0 let me have her this week because she is very much like me...OH so much like me..down to the poetry and the way she puts up walls..o..but then my friends put me back in my place..showing me who God is and how foolish of me to question it at...all ...SO today is my day off and so thankful for the opportunity to fellowship with my friends and see what Gods doing :) OH YA LOL

I love these girls.....;) Look at them look at them im the one in the fro lol

GOD IS SO GOOD

....he is allowing me to go back to the island to counsel for this last week...oh God you are just so good I am so thankful for what you do...*smiles* OH he is so good...*dances* that means i will be gone...until..september..idk if i will be able to write on this..but i will try...
Pray for us this week as we are going through the last week of camp and i cannot wait to see what God does !!!!!
*giggles* ohh yes Lord!
In other news..i burnt my ear on a curling iron.. I will never curl my hair again LOL <3

tell me the truth

I need to get something off of my chest....
#1-how can you claim to be a Christian..and yet tell me you love me, and hate me..and that you think im not a Christian because i wont date you...then MONTHS later when i try to make things right( WHEN I DID NOTHING WRONG ) you call me a tumor and dis me again..and then on top of that talk to all the people i know and love just to get to me...
#2-GROW UP AHHHHHHHHHh
-_-...sorry I really needed to get that out..not that anyone really reads this anyway but..it's a good way for me to vent ha..im getting my tattoo fixed tomorrow PTL...i am so sick of looking at it the way it is..hopefully she can fix my butterfly one as well but if not..i will just have to pay full price to get that fixed which would be saddening to me lol..but its special to me so..i want to get that fixed...im excited to get mine fixed up..im nervous because i got burned with her once..but i do love her, and i just really want to be proud of her when i show her off you know? which is going to happen since shes ON MY LEG ha...:) ...hmmm God has been so good to me today..I had a huge no soda drinking headache. so i had a little bit of coffee and it made me feel a lot better...spent some time in Gods word today and just loving it! I watched LAink pretty much all day,after i did dishes and laundry..i felt like a bum but i really did a bit of work..lets see..i have to work on my room tomorrow..getting ready for college and all...Im going to be in New Hampshire until school starts with my friend Sheila and i am so pumped about that! it is going to be 3 weeks of complete crazy fun...and w000t i am so excited!! :)

That's it..for the day lol im waking up early in the a.m..9 for the tat fix so..;) here we go lovey doves...so thankful for this girl fixing it for 30bucks..thats not bad at all <3
ENDING ON A LOVELY NOTE
-Lovely- HA

update major

it has been 80 days since i cut 80 80 80 80 80 80 80 80 YES 80! HOW EXCITING!!! I cannot even believe it, i mean..of course I can my God is faithful and he has made it so hat i have power enough in him to do this....:-D PRAISE THE LORD...oh man! so
I decided to ....make this 80 day excitement i've also decided to stop drinking soda...so that starts today and...i am excited to make this change. i am also going to try to do 30 minutes of exorcise everyday. i already did 33 today, and i want to do some more when my mom gets home. I want to be healthy..:)
I also have decided im going to be myself..or well better put, who God has made me to be.. I am done trying to make other people happy...it isnt the way i was made to live, and i refuse to do it :) ANY LONGER :-D
God you are so good, and you are the only voice that i should be listening to. Lord I know you put many things into my life that I dont particularly like, but Lord you are in control of it all and i am so thankful for that. God thank you for giving me people in my life who really love me. Lord who really care for who i am and what ive been through. and God i thank you that you love me regardless of all ive done to hurt you Lord, all i've done to ruin your name. You are so forgiving and so amazing. Lord help me forgive those who hurt me God, who all they want to do is put me down. I know that isn't your will Lord so i ask for those people to realize what they are doing to themselves by acting like that towards people, and lord help them grow in you
thank you Lord

lifting up prayer for the stumps

God right now i come before you on behalf of Randi and Graham Stump. Lord Randi is hurting so badly right now Lord, you know Graham's status..and Lord. the doctors say he wont wake up and if he does, that in itself will be a miricle, Lord that if he does he will only be able to "survive" God we believe in such a bigger God then that. Lord we believe that you can heal him completely, lord you've done it so many times..God show them..who you are Lord i ask you to give the family comfort and peace beyond ALL this world could understand. God that you would show them your love like never before.

Im a fanatic

A moment of frustration...in my day...why do people think that as Christians we need to let everyone walk all over us...guess what THATS NOT WHAT BEING A CHRISTIAN IS ABOUT...we are to love and we are to care for people..but we will stick up for what we believe in and we will say how much we love Christ, pray for our food and if you dont like it that we dont curse, drink, or smoke...guess you'll have to deal with it because that is were I stand..Of course we aren't perfect..I know i screw up way more then i should, and i know that it isn't going to be easy...but GOD IS SO GOOD and gives us so much to look for..im just so sick of people complaining because I am a fanatical...w/e ...you know what if you call fanatic being different ,sticking up for what i believing in and telling you guess what..if you dont believe in my God you will go to hell *Shrug* It's the truth and if the truth is fanatic...then ;)
IM A F A N A T I C fanatic i'll rep christ until i d i e
<3

I LOVE IT

Today was such a fantastic day! and i spent most of it with my best friend Katelyn!! She came and got me and we headed to the beach!! It was SO beautiful! (even if it was a little chilly) we lay there for a bit and just listened to people, and had little laughs here and there *shrug* after about an hour of that, we decided that swimming wasn't the best because of the wind..(and all i brought was a blanket and pillow...not a towel) so...we got up and decided to grab some pizza, popcorn and a movie! We did so and went to her grandmothers and watched tim burton's 9! It was pretty cute..you could definitely tell a tim burton film! After the movie, i had the bright idea of going to the grave yard and chilling there, and reading some grave stones...so of course WE DID
<3
so yeah...this is katelyn and the "Hand" grave..we couldn't help ourselves..ya maybe we are jerks but W/E they are dead and they love us doing this..because you know what when im dead..TAKE ALL THE PICS OF MY GRAVE YOU WANNA BABY cause im not going to be here...<3>
Yeah...so this is me by some cool cross one...yah...after that we went to another grave yard that's actually..like 4 min from my house...and it's HUGE..i never realized how big it was b4...and we went to the very back to start..and there was like...a machine to dig new graves..i wanted a picture near it but Katelyn said no way :) LOL
it was so fun and i am so thankful for my friend...lol .....
After that we came back to my house and just chilled, listened to music and played a cemetery game on her computer for like 40 min. after that she decided to go..and that's been my day :)
Tomorrow is church and i am so looking foward to it!

A lesson from Hosea

Hosea 2:13-16 (New International Version)

¹³ I will punish her for the days
she burned incense to the Baals;
she decked herself with rings and jewelry,
and went after her lovers,
but me she forgot,"
declares the LORD.

¹⁴ "Therefore I am now going to allure her;
I will lead her into the desert
and speak tenderly to her.

¹⁵ There I will give her back her vineyards,
and will make the Valley of Achor ^a]">[a] a door of hope.
There she will sing ^b]">[b] as in the days of her youth,
as in the day she came up out of Egypt.

¹⁶ "In that day," declares the LORD,
"you will call me 'my husband';

you will no longer call me 'my master. ^c]">[c] '

WOW....So i was reading this and it was so exciting to think about..the Lord does punish us when we are stupid..he punishes us because he loves us..BUT GUESS WHAT..right after he punishes us...he brings us out and he shows us his love. he shows us what we've done and what he did..and how he loves us..the depth of that love and the greatness of it!! *sigh* it's so wonderful that we have a God who wants us. Who loves us enough to take us out show us the wrong and help us fix it, then reward us and love on us more....W-O-W
GREAT ARE YOU LORD AND WORTHY OF PRAISE.....
Lord thank you so much for all you've done for me. Lord thank you for showing me your love, and especially your grace and mercy when I do stupid things Lord. You are my all in all, you are the only thing Lord that keeps me going and i am so thankful for that. Lord im thankful that you have put in my life the people that I love. Lord the people that maybe i dont love as much as i should. Help me with that Lord..help me realize why you put these people in my lives, and help me love them just as much as you do. God you are SO GOOD
Amen

He is so faithful

TODAY
was a great day! I Went to the island..and got to see my friends! Oh how exciting to see how God is working in the lives of my friends on the island, and in these teen girls lives!! HOW THEY CHANGE.. It was really really cool! got to sit under the teaching of wise men of God..so good just to hear the lessons again. i've heard some of them before but oh what God teaches you when you are really listening and want to learn from his word..it was so key to me today...
:::that all I can do is abide...that's all I have strength to do..and even that strength is from him::: praise the Lord that he has such power and strength..to give us power and strength <3.....
Going home tomorrow...I don't want to. id love to stay in North Hudson forever, or hey maybe at the island with my friends for the last 2 weeks..but that isn't what God has for me..and I am excited to see what the rest of the summer brings. and the good God has in it for me :)...for I KNOW he is faithful..even when im not :)
<3

crazyness

I miss those people more then life ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ <3
wow..God has been teaching me so much *shakes head*i love it so much but at the time it seems so painful..but isnt that learning ;) ...lol
I am so excited to see God and his good through all of this..it still hurts a lot ..but i am so thankful for people like the bennetts..that show me the good, and who hang out with me and just get my mind off the hard things..lol
Hes been showing me so much just lately about what he does for us and what he can do through us if we give him our whole lives..if we dont just give him bits and pieces..like oh yeah Lord you can have my ...time but not my love life, or Lord those friends..they are....well I know they arent the best Lord but.. *shakes head*
Im learning SO much about his sovereignty and his love...

I have a question, and id so appreciate it if you could help me... My sister is living with her ex's bf's family..the dad gets drunk and hits on her...and they do pot...
I told her that she needs to leave...she says she hates me and she says that shes going to leave and never talk to me again.....
*sigh*
I dont know if im doing the right thing

God you are so good

W-o-W i dont even really know what to say...except thank you Lord, and forgive me for being so foolish as to think I could cling any less..Lord that I would think..I could possibly step away from that bubble Lord and be ok..that I had it "all under control" Lord thank you so much for humbeling me and showing me that in fact i dont have it under control Lord and i will probably ALWAYS need to cling on to you for that. God you've been so good to me..Lord and i am again just so sorry..*sigh*
Lord you...are so good and so strong.
Thank you for being the strength that keeps me going Lord. Thank you for being the one who loves me when no one else does. and lord the one who loves me more then anyone else COULD love me even if they tried. Lord i just...i cant imagine anyone loving me more then you, and i thank you so much for allowing me to see that today Lord. the pure...love that you have for me God, that isn't selfish or Lustful. I am so thankful for that Lord. Help me love you the same Lord. with all of my heart. willing to do anything for you Lord. Not wanting to back down when it gets hard Lord.
thank you again Lord...and right now Lord i want to give my expectations to you. God it's so hard when my hear thinks so many things ...oh Lord you are so good and i ask that you keep my mind stayed on you because that is were the peace is..

G-O-N-E

Ok! I just thought id let you all know that I am going to be away for the week...tonight until the following sunday. It will go by fast I assure you ;) and you won't miss me to much ^_^ I am going to my "new" aunts house. she is my age and I am very excited to be spending a week with her..and just a teaser..when i come back..i'll be different. im not going to share exactly how yet but...You'll know thats for SURE <3

Communion what is it/isn't it

W-O-W God is so good!! Church was excellent! Let me just tell you!! we talked about what Communion is/isn't! And it was awesome so im going to share it w/ you ;)
WHAT COMMUNION ISN'T::::
*It doesn't save you-acts 16:31;Ephesians 2:8-9;Romans 10:9-10
*It doesnt make you a better Christian- col 2:10
*Isnt showing you are in good fellowship with God -matthew 22:37-40;Galatians 5:22-23
*Doesnt in itself restore fellowship with God -1 corinthians 11:1;1 john 1:9,Revelation 2:5 (REPENT)
*Will not have communion during the millenium. it will happen until he returns.
-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-
WHAT COMMUNION IS:::::
*it is for believers 1 corinthians 11;1 corinthians 1; Hebrews 12
*A matter of obedience-1 corinthians 11:24
*Intended to be a showing of your relationship with God vs 29 of 1corinthians 11.
vs 29-examine yourself...examine=inspect closely=
*communion is to remember what Christ did..his death. it is in essence a memorial service.
(John 3:16,Romans 5:8, 1John 5, Acts 4:2;John 10:17-18,Philippians 2:7-8)

It is so easy for us sometimes to forget exactly what God had to deal with when we live our daily lives. Communion really is for us to stop and think about exactly what he went through and how we need to remember that.
(HE DID IT FOR ME) REMEMBER THAT