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Why does it seem like when you need things to be calm it's the most hectic...why when you feel like your friends are all good and everything is good...it just goes Ballistic im not going to lie it's getting to be so much and it's crushing me under its weight...God is so good and I know this but WHY ...is this going on..I know I shouldn't be asking why..I should be asking who...God..that's the answer *shrug* I'm just so sick of this highs chool drama that makes everything difficult for everyone involved.. If anyone who knows right and doesnt do it..to him it is sin..and I do not want it to be sin on my part but I DO NOT WANT TO DEAL W/ THIS..how selfish of me..*sigh* I am just trying to get my attitude back where it should be and it is slowly..i tell you slowly going there...*slam* o well..God is so faithful and i know that so im not quite sure why ....
*shrugs*

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wow! Life has been so crazy lately..-_- it seems like updating people on what it's been like is going to be just as insane..lol i thought i guess id be a lot easier then this to keep myself updated..but alas those things are not true. anyways...*cough* ahem...Life has been hecktic...this is certainly true, but the exciting thing is, as hecktic as life gets..I know God's got my back..and that's just something im continually learning because it's hard..like i have no idea what to do about after word of life. i dont think im going to be able to come to second year because my grades arent that good..and it kills me i dont know what im going to be able to do..i am...blhahhjdjf ANYWAY im trying not to worry and im trying to know that God has great plans for me and that he loves me and is waiting for me to jump on to that plan..it's just a bit more scary then i expected it to be..Im growing, and it's insane to see....im going to canada hopefully with my dc during break! :) How exciting is that going to be?!?! W00t and suuuch L-O-L I put in my passport application, and got my picture and everything friday...so we will see..they said 4-6 weeks..so may 21st i should have it, it could happen before..but maybe later? they dont know..*sigh* it's a scary scary thing to have but..i know w/e happens God is in control. I want to learn how to drive and thats why i think im going to not work on the island but we will see *sigh* GOD IS SO GOOD..i love him im just so scared of what i dont know...
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